Memories – The Lashes

~A deep breath~

~Shivering~

Wondering how I got into this mess

She’s watching

Friends are looking

The whole school is present

A habitual late comer….

1!

Ajei!

Fear in my heart

A sting on my ass

I can do…

2!!

Aish!

This second one really stings

But hey,

Think of the cheers, the ‘fans’…..

3!!!

Damn!

Hot!

~My body’s heating up~

~My eyes beginning to water~

Duke don’t…

4!!!!

Ouch!

This one is a venomous bite

Not a sting

Maybe a cobra’s

Or a puff adder’s

~Body trembling~

5!!!!!

Oh God!!!

Eh, I can't take this

~Teary eyed~

~Flaming buttocks~

Hey, be brave

She’s looking…

But I want to touch

Don’t…

6!!!!!!

Shit!!!

~Heat all over~

I’ve done it

She’s smiling at me

They cheering me...

Endured six lashes

No flinching

~Trembling~

My ass, a furnace

I wondered if my feet could take me to the classroom

Some friends cheered me

My legs didn’t fail

I got to class

I was trembling within

My emotions, a freely flowing river                    *

I built a dam around it

These guys shouldn’t see you cry

She shouldn’t see you show pain

I tried to sit

I couldn’t

Welts on my butt

The dam overflowing

No! I can take it no more

I can't

The dam burst!!!

******************

(This occured when i was in JSS (or Junoir High School)

This goes to all those who were able to endure Mr. Twumasi’s (gbashu) jams, Miss Agbozo, Mr Cantreph, Mr Hans, Miss(?) Dowuna (dat head mistress who makes u touch your toes as she lashes you), Mr Mensah, etc…

Oh, and how can I forget Mr. Dominic Nyame’s two goons, Monsieur Zigah, and Tonton Tiana

(pardon me if I didn’t get some of the names out)

Robbed

He returns from work

He sees his wife

She was nude

He sees his PA* too

In his birthday suit

They were both sweaty

Initiating heated sessions

Of multiple fluid transfers

He bellowed, the PA run

He caught his wife

By her neck

Boobs juggling

He wasn’t enticed

He struck

He hit her once

He hit her twice

He hit a third

And then she’s down

She makes a call

And then another

After the third

The police are in

They cuffed him

And gave him a slap

They tell him it’s bad

To hit a woman

He retorts: “So what?”

“She is my wife”

“And I have the right”

“To give her discipline”

“That matters not”

The police replied

“You are the first on the list”

“Of wanted criminals”

****************************************

*PA – Personal Assistant

Morale of the story: If you want to be an armed robber, NEVER have a personal assistant! If possible, rob alone!!!

Based on a true rumor

Just a Call

A call, eh

Just a call o

Just a call I forgot to make

She sent me a text, I realized my mistake

So I called 700 times, she refused to pick

Now my heart is bleeding, stabbed with a sharpened stick

I sent 7000 messages, she replied none

My sorrows multiplied; at least she should reply one

I even sent another, making it 7001

In it I told her she was my sun

She’s so hot; I always have to buy a new fan

And she’s the only force that makes my blood run

If she thought there was another woman

I assured her there was none.

We were meant to be, at least, that was the plan

Darling, I plead

Just a reply

And I wouldn’t die

Like a semiconductor, I’d be doped high

And fly high like Elijah and soar through the sky

Together, we’d form a car, with you being the chassis, and me, the tire

In fact, I promise I’d wear that blue tie

Please, just reply….

Memories – The First Math Lecture

“d/dx [In f(x)] …”

(Yawn)

I’m so bored

My first lecture

And d/dx [In f(x)]

What is In f(x)….

This lecturer is too serious

He should give me a break

I looked round the class

For students reaction

Some were worried

A few, scared

Others couldn’t be bothered

“The integral of a cosine with respect to…”

Hm, I want to walk out

As I almost stood up

Something bright caught my attention

Was it an angel?

My gaze was stuck

Caught by an awesome ethereal being

My ass quickly back on the seat

Her face, the North Pole

My eyes, the South Pole

Magnetic attraction

This class began to interest me

I wouldn’t mind being her explicit function

Her chin in her palm

Her lips like a rose about to blossom

“Make u = f(x) such that…”

I wish I was an insect

So I could fly unnoticed

To land on her lips

And suck out her nectar

(I Inhale deeply)

Her eyes, ahhh,

(Exhale)

So warm, so bright

Like those four rays of sunshine

Filtering through the gaps in the blinds

Her lips touched my heart

How I wish I could…

“Gentleman…”

She looks in my direction

My heart pacing faster

“Gentleman…”

She smiles

Her face blossoms…

“G E N T L E M A N!!!”

I’m I being addressed?

“G E N T L E M A N!!!”

My neck turned

The monster lecturer…

“DO I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION?”

“Wha… Erm… I… Erm… ”

“Pardon me sir…?”

Beautiful Distortions

White foam on a blue canvass

Smudgy, fudgy shapes

One moment, an anvil

Then in another, a hammer

No, a muscular arm

Oh, a sword rather

Well, beautiful distortions

A forging is taking place….

"Rhymerick"

Baby come close, let me touch your leg

Milady, be the hole, and I’d be the peg

Crazy I’m not, I might give u a peck

Dukey is my name, what’s yours, I beg

Hazy? Not at all, it’s just your love, sweet Meg

Guilty as hell, yes, you I want to “preg”

Fly, I plead in my private jet

Why my lady, why do you reject

Try; show your love, you are my love project

(Oh) My, you giggled, I would respect

Lie on your back, your body I’d inspect

High, rise up and let me inject

Coy, nice smile, I promise you won’t regret

The One

You are like an imported phone with a locked code

On which I’d to spend money just to decode

I wouldn’t mind if you promise your heart is mine

So together we’d be; sine and cosine

But then, your smile; it’s like my grandma’s riddles

It confuses me like Mr. Mensah’s mathematical puzzles

Whenever I deduce I should differentiate

You prove me wrong and make me integrate

With you, there are no constants, just variables

 Your words are like apocrypha parables

For your inverted attitude, I’d apply a Fourier transform

To detect if to my likes you would conform

Don’t you see, these four alphabets I feel for you

Is making me breathless just like flu

Thoughts of you make this madness approach infinity

And I pledge I’ll be yours till eternity

Feeling your lips make my head spin like alikoto

And I wonder if you’ve fed me to Nogokpo

But I care not, be my wife and please say yes

And in my empire, you’d be the only empress….