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Saturday, 3 September 2011

White Hot Flame


I turned on the lights
And she was there
She was angry
And disappointed
And slightly drunk
With a gun
Aimed at my chest
She looked dangerous
She still loves me
But she won’t let me continue
To torture her, to live
Fear masks my face
As her index finger
Applies firm pressure
To the trigger

She took my lessons seriously
Memories of the shooting range
I held her hips
Corrected her stance
Showed her how to cradle the gun
 Showed her not to jerk the trigger
“How would you like your breasts caressed?”
Her dreamy eyes held mine
“Gentle, firm...”
I put a finger to her lips
“Don’t say too much”
“I don’t want to walk round with a tent in my pants”
She giggled
“That’s what you do to the trigger” I said
“You don’t jerk it”
“Just squeeze it, firm and gentle”
POW!!!
Bulls-eye
Almost
She giggled again
She had a good aim
A perfect eye

Those memories
Made more globules of sweat
Form and drip
From my sweaty face
The nozzle aimed at my chest
She squeezed the trigger

She forgot one tip though
The choice of gun
“Always prefer a revolver to an automatic...”
“Revolvers never let you down”
She had an automatic.
A .45 ACP
And it let her down
It got jammed
Like a frog
I leapt
And knocked the gun out of her grip
The pistol fell
And skidded away
Under the couch it went

She kicked out
Her left foot at my groin
She missed…
“OUCH!!”
I trained her too well
The kick, powerful
Caught me in my lower abdomen
I crumbled
Her Persian carpet
Kissing my cheeks
She jumped on me
She wouldn’t give up
I’m in shit

Ooops…
In mid-air
Her right breast
Escaped her blouse
And fell on me
She fell on me
She’s mighty heavy
She’s mighty strong

I felt her long manicured nails
Red and black
Slapping my face
“Lucy, I Swear I did nothing…”
I felt the open wound
It stung
As a sweat drop dripped in

“You lair, Son of a b*tch”
She was sobbing
“You promised”
“You pledged”
“You vowed”
Should I throw her off?
I tried
She had me pinned down
Both of her thighs
At my sides
Her knees
Restricted my arms
“That tramp”
She screamed
She was crying now
“Your mistress”
“You said you’ve broken up”
“Yet she calls, tormenting me”
“She told me you were there”
“You both ate”
“And you ate”
“And slept”
“I even heard you snore”
“And she taunted me”
“Said I can never ever have you”

I smiled
“Darling, she’s a lying tramp”
That girl is devilish
I wondered how I even got involved with her
“Please look in my left pocket”
“And take out my phone”
“Check the caller ID”
“Check the pictures I took today”

Her anger subsided
Her exposed breasts….
“Oh” she said
“You were at the parade”
“And you went over to my parents’ place”
“Why?” she asked

She looked at my face
I looked at hers
My eyes didn’t
They remained on her breast
That nipple…
She must have felt my hardening member
She shifted
She sighed
Our eyes made contact
I saw it
She saw it too…..

Friday, 2 September 2011

Sweet Nothingness


I so much yearn
And desire for the black pit.
The cessation of life
In black emptiness.

Silent gloom,
Please take over me!
Perished thoughts and,
Non-existent emotions.

Sweet nothingness,
My ultimate wish.
Resident sorrow
You are sacked.

Will cry no more.
Will hurt no more.
When I’m gone,
You’d have me no more!

SLEEPING WITHOUT A HEART

I try to sleep through this emptiness
But sleep comes to me not
I hear Alicia Keys playing far off
Sleeping with a broken heart
Our song
It’s like I’m on her bed
Contemplating
Thinking of you
I know you will never return
Yet I sill dream of you

They said it will help
It will bring me some closure
If I destroyed your memoirs
I did
Your pictures
Your negligee
Your Brazilian wigs
I set them ablaze

Closure it brought me not
Thoughts of you flared
I swim in your essence
Your presence engulfs me
I wish they’d bring you back

A way I try to find
To live without you
Those ways
I found none
As if multiplied by zero

Every morn
Thoughts of your touch
So tender and feathery, it tickles

Taking my bath brings misery
I smell your fragrance
Those sweet scented baths we took

Eating is agony
Your delicious fingers in my mouth
Your favorite spice
Diffusing, subliming, evaporating
Swinging my appetite
Like your mood swings

It hurts sitting in front of the TV
The fun we make of the news readers
Our favorite programs
Our fights over the remote control
Our secret activity on the couch whiles watching CSI

These break me down
I want to move on
I can't

It broke my heart
When you went with him
It crippled me
When he laid his filthy hands
His icy hands
On you

I never wanted you to go
He is so merciless, cruel
Death
Please release Lucy
Take some else